Adult and Non-Veg Jokes

[Abnne13]

Jokes kissko aacha nahi lagta!! Kabhi kabhi hum jeene ki chakar me ......hasna bool jaate hain. Toh kyu na hum wapis hasneko seekhen.....The jokes here will be in English and Hindi. You are free to add your own jokes here.

A boss said to his secretary, "I want to have SEX with you I will make it very fast. I'll throw $1000 on the floor, by the time you bend down to pick it I'll be done."

She thought for a moment then called her boyfriend and told him the story. Her boyfriend then said to her, do it but "Ask him for $2000, pick up the money very fast he wouldn't even have enough time to undress himself."

So she agrees. Half an hour goes by, the boyfriend decides to call his girlfriend. He asks, "What happened?" She responds, "The Bastard used coins I'm still picking and he is still fucking!"

 

[Abnne13]

“Honey”, says the wife to her husband, “last night I had the most AMAZING dream. I dreamed that we were making love and next to our bed there was a black man from Africa who was waving a fan and that gave me great satisfaction.”

The couple decided to make the dream come true, so they found a black man and offered him 500 rupees to wave the fan to them while they made love. The three of them went home and the couple started having sex while the black man was waving the fan.

But still, the wife couldn’t get any satisfaction. So she proposed that they should change roles. She would make love with the black man and the husband would wave the fan next to them. The husband accepted and started waving the fan…

After a while, the wife screamed with pleasure and asked for more! Then the husband said to the black man: “Do you understand now how you should wave the fan, you asshole?”

 

[Abnne13]

I was working in the garden last weekend and my wife was about to take a shower. I realized that I couldn't find the rake. I yelled up to my wife, 'Where is the rake?'

She couldn't hear me and she shouted back, 'What?'

I pointed to my eye, and then I pointed to my knee and made a raking motion.

Then too, my wife wasn't sure and said 'What?'

I repeated the gestures. 'Eye - Kneed - The Rake'

My wife replied that she understands and signals back. She first points to her eye, next she points to her left breast, then she points to her backside, and finally to her crotch. Well, there is no way in hell I could even come close to that one.

Exasperated, I went upstairs and asked her, 'What the hell was that?'

She replies,

Scroll on - it is worth it, I promise!










'Eye - Left Tit - Behind - The Bush'.

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A mother-in-law arrives home from the mall to find her son-in-law boiling angry and hurriedly packing his suitcase.

"What happened?", she asks anxiously.

"What happened? I'll tell you what happened.

... I sent an email to my wife telling her I was coming home today from my business trip. I get home.. and.. guess what I found?

Yes, your daughter, my wife.. with a guy in our marital bed.

This is unforgivable.. the end of our marriage. I'm done. I'm leaving forever.."

"Calm down.. calm down.. my son," says.. his mother-in-law. "There is something very odd going on here. My daughter would never do such a thing. There must be a simple explanation.
I'll go speak to her immediately and find out what happened.."

Moments later.. the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile.

"I told you there must be a simple explanation. She didn't get the email"

___________________________________________________________________________________________

A man goes home to his wife, after being fired from his job at a potato chips factory.

The wife is surprised because the man has been an employee of the company for 13 months in a row.

She asks "What happened?"

"I got fired for putting my penis in the potato slicer. It's been a dream of mine, and I couldn't resist it anymore", the man replied.

The wife, even more surprised after hearing what happened, asked if everything is okay with his penis.

"Yes everything is fine with the penis", he replied.

"What about the potato slicer?", she asked.

A bit ashamed, he replied, "She got fired as well".

Baccha.khan ...Bro, Thanks for all your LIKES. Kaash aap jaise aur kuch Members hote.....

 

[Abnne13]

XP 007 .....Bahut aacha lagta hai, jab Staff (woh bhi ADMIN) Thread dekhta hai aur Smiley deta hai, busy hone ke bawjud. Kaash, yeh aur bhi Members karte!

Iss Forum me jaan laane ke liye do hi tarike hain. ("Sannata kyun hai bhai?" poochnewale).

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[XP 007]

Baccha.khan ...Bro, Thanks for all your LIKES. Kaash aap jaise aur kuch Members hote.....

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